Think Big and Bold
Last week, I decided to head to Florida and spend a weekend with my incredible coach and mentor Fabienne Fredrickson. She hosted a 3 day extravaganza in Orlando at a stunning hotel complex which she called her ’Mindset Retreat’. Whilst she is a shrewd business woman, she is deeply caring about women stepping up and thinking in a bid and bold way.
Initially I almost said no to the opportunity. I know how hard it is to invest time and money into personal development. It’s so easy to say no because we have too much going on in work and the hassle / jet lag of travelling half way around the world can be too overwhelming. And yet whenever I push myself out of my comfort zone I reap so many benefits. Not only in taking a well earned mental rest from our never ending to do lists, but in meeting inspiring others and the learning and insights. I wanted to share a little of the experience with you and hopefully it will inspire you to think bigger and bolder too.
The event was split into three days:
Day One: Think big and bold
Day Two: Shift the gunk
Day Three: Have the faith to make it happen
That’s it! Simple you would think. But boy did she get you to dive deep on what was important to you (and being American, there were plenty of tears!).
Most of us typically focus on what is going wrong and the problems that we need to work through. Our brains are almost programmed to wake up and think about all the things we need to do today. So Fabienne kicked off by asking us to list the things we ’Don’t Want In Life’ – most people filled at least a page! The great thing about this activity is that by emptying our brain it then frees up the space to focus on what we do want in life.
We were asked to complete an IKIGAI exercise. This is a Japanese concept identifying how to get to the heart of our message for being here on the planet. There are four strands to brainstorm. Where they overlap is where your core purpose sits.
- Your passion – what do you love most
- Your mission – what do you believe the world most needs
- Your vocation – what are you currently paid to do
- Your profession – What else are you good at
It’s a great exercise, and the idea of thinking bigger and bolder means you embrace the messages that come through for you. And we must not sit in our comfort zone – otherwise we will always get the same results.
Shifting the Gunk
On Day Two we focused on the power of the subconscious mind to drive what we are about. Did you know that our conscious mind only drives 5-10% of our behaviour? The great news is that we can imprint new ways of thinking into our subconscious (as it can’t tell the difference between reality and imagination). The more you think about what you want (with positive emotion) the more your subconscious will make it happen. Similarly (and the scary part) the more you think about what you don’t want, the more you attract that into your life as well.
When I was first introduced to this, many years ago, I tested it out. I had heard that if you believe there is a car parking space near the front of the supermarket, there will always be one. I went with an open mind. And I found one. I thought it was luck to be honest. So I did it again. And again. And again. Every single time. And if ever there isn‘t one, I kid you not, within a minute someone is reversing out. Try it. But you have to believe it will happen for it to be true!
And what holds us back? It’s our beliefs and our fears. We can very easily keep ourselves small. Fabienne sees it all the time with women. How often we sit back. Perhaps we don’t think we have an important role to play. And many times, women can think that the world is out to get them. My Dad always said to me that Fear is purely the unknown. And once we step into that unknown the fear evaporates. It’s that bold trait we need!
Fabienne shared this very powerful quote from Marianne Williamson:
“Fear is a psychic tyrant that has no intention of letting it’s slave go free. It will always seek to preserve itself.”
Have a go at brainstorming the fears that are holding you back? And the great news. Fears are NOT REAL! Once you get them out on paper I think you may be surprised at what you have been holding onto.
I encourage you to think about what it is that you want from your life and your career. Start to think really big and then bring it down a dial or two. Your dreams must always be on the outside of your comfort zone but not so far away they become distant hopes. Next, step into your discomfort zone (One step at a time) with faith and commitment. Set yourself one simple goal today, something that feels a stretch but is not going to create havoc in your life. Think big and bold. You may just be amazed at what will start to show up for you.